Two Poems
all my friends are going insane & S. said lately I have been too acquainted with survival,
by Ocean Wei
all my friends are going insane
after Cameron Awkward-Rich
we walk into the ocean. waves well over our broken toes, faded green like jade. we are doves with heavy wings, cuttlefishes with flower crowns. we are seagrass that drown men & shattered shells that carry corses. we are green, so green, filled with poison & envy. tired of lilies & perfect pearls, we swallow the bubbles. look, why not be monstrous. why not suffocate & bury their bloating bodies with sand. why not revenge. we smile & drag their feet down.
S. said lately I have been too acquainted with survival,
she is not wrong. this
morning my torso suffocates
& all my yearnings fly like
kites with broken strings. I
can’t tell anybody that the
moon is sacred without
saying your name. this
morning I threw up again in
the bathroom sink: this is a
type of yearning. I wasn’t
born in America, I only
birthed myself here. If I can
breathe fourth of july
fireworks, I can swallow
anything like sky like sea like
country. it is my sin to grow
into a country that ejects me.
it is my sin to grow into a
country. to want a good
daughter bad citizen good
comrade bad lover. red
passport blue passport: makes
me anew. make me rebirth
into a body of water & make
me rooted without
habituation. I yearn & yearn
& yearn.
Ocean Wei is a trans writer and a senior at Kenyon College. His works are in or forthcoming in Brevity, The B'K, and en*gendered lit. You can find him on Twitter and Instagram at @_oceanwei.